A Thoughts/Feelings OVERLOAD!!

I don’t know about others that happen to struggle with Crossdressing, Transgenderism, Gender Confusion… or even homosexuality… well, let me make it a more open field for others:  Anyone who struggles with their identity – whether you may consider it sexual or gender or whatever…   Anywho, when anyone in the above condition, have you ever experienced a total overload of feeling, thoughts, words, imagery? To get more precise, where when you sense that you’re compelled to keep yourself accountable – to God ultimately – but you also feel compelled to expose this with someone safe and who can keep you accountable about your struggles, but. . . .  you have more thoughts, feeling, words, imagery and multiple, separate occurrence of all of the above,  that when you try to let someone else know about these things you’ve had in your head, you cannot get it out!!

 

You’re truly overloaded and you cannot even get even one single occurrence with one complete thought from your head and out of your mouth!!

 

I hope someone understood this post. I apologize for the run-on sentences.  But does anyone else understand this??  I’m truly confused about this!

 

~   Michael . . . ~

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “A Thoughts/Feelings OVERLOAD!!

  1. I’m sorry to hear that your mind’s been racing, Michael. I think I can sympathize with what you mean, because I’ve felt it too, though to lesser extents lately (but still it seems all-consuming). Last week, there were several stretches at work and at home that all I could seemingly think about was past experiences and fantasies of “acting out”. It wasn’t exactly that I wished I could have pressed “Pause” on the rest of the world and indulged in some “physically gratifying” outlet; but I was obsessed with thoughts sorting through them, and felt longing for those things to the point that it tied me up in knots.

    Telling my wife about the rough time I was having with my thoughts helped, but the internal DVD player has a way of making sure I don’t forget the images that used to play on it all the time. I’m still working through what my experiences, temptations, and desires say about needs I’m trying to fill or patterns that need to change; but I’m considering bringing up my heart-searching to our marriage counselor next time we meet.

    You’re in my prayers, friend. I praying that God will surround you with strong brothers and sisters who provide a safe space and firm boundaries for you.

    SDG
    –Max

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s